.Friday, April 11, 2008 ' 10:49 pm Y
things seem so distant nownothing means anything to me anymoreafter that faithful sunday, my life's just been drained out of bit by bittoday was just the worst for meright now all i want is for you to just tell me that everything's going to be alrightthat its not my fault that it was for the bestbut my longing for you is in vainit doesn't matter anymorebecause no matter the amount of tears that i've shed, things will never be like how it used to bei just want you to tell that you've got my back and you'll be there alwaysplease make my day make me smilemake me glee for the first time in 3 weeksi miss that sense of security that you gave menothing else mattered so long i was with younowall that will make all my pain and heartache go away is just a simple hello or take carei'll be glad. that's how much i yearn for your concern, your voice, your lovei've been an empty shell for the past 3 weeks walking without a heart.i think its no longer with me. just like how you're not with me anymorei knew this was bound to happen but i didn't expect it to be so soonthe sorrow and loneliness is getting unbearablei wait longingly for things to restore itselfi know its of no use. knowing that it is, just makes everything worsetime has been zooming past. people come and go, i know but it never hurt so bad everyou were my life. you made me what i wasno wonder i'm heartless and pathetic nowa part of me is non-existant. my heart-----------------------------------------------i feel like a complete bitch todayi promised myself i wouldn't do this ever againi disgust myself. thank you zakiyyah for trying to make me feel better but i doubt the pain will ever go awayi know i suck. i know i don't deserve you. i know you'd die for a change but there's nothing i can doi am sorry that i'm such a loser who let my mood and temper get the better of me. i wanted today to be the best day that's happened to me this year. but i made that impossible for myselfallowed my mood and stuff to affect my dayi shouldn't have even went today. was pointless anyways. i think should just shut up from now on. since everything that i say always ruins everythingdear you, i want and i need you.now. ilu<3
♥AZRINAris